I stood there paralyzed by the
repercussions that had only begun to unfold.
My clammy hands could not stop shaking.
The sound of my short shallow breaths became inaudible as my mind tried
to comprehend what I had done. My vision
became blurred. Different colors began
to bleed into each other hemorrhaging through the very fabric of
existence.
I could feel the
weight of every bone, every muscle, every thought. I was
imprisoned in my flesh with liberation existing behind the veil of reality. If I could just detach myself from this
physical world and escape the rules of cause and effect. If could just change my decision, a decision
I did not willfully make, I could continue to live out my petty existence. Why must I be blamed for the mistakes that
fate has made? How can my actions be
judged and my destiny determined when my freewill was hacked from my being?
Cold air filled
my lungs. Every breath was an agonizing
testament of my endurance. Physical pain
mattered little as I realized I was now placed on a predetermined path. No longer would I be able to indulge my
apathetic cravings. I now envied the man
who passively went through life not realizing the great gift and curse that
freewill really was.
I wondered what
had brought about such rashness. I had
always prided myself on my meticulous ability to make a decision. I always weighed every option and
hypothesized every possible outcome.
There was never a moment when I wasn’t in control.
I could hear the
fates laughing at me as I realized any resistance to my new path was delusive. Their soft voices allowed their laughter to
trap me in a canopy of despair. There I
stood for all to see, the man, the fool fate had chosen to make an example
of. The Moirai sung a melancholic song
to comfort my wretched soul and then laughed as I began to feel soothed.
I stand here now
regaining control of my physical form, remembering what I regret. I was lucky to have lived this long mostly
content but now I can join the rest of the world in a disheartened
existence. I will forever be changed and always regret
accidentally disliking my favorite song on Pandora.
... Don't be ridiculous !!
ReplyDelete