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Reviews of Reviews:Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates

Before I went into the movie theater I decided to redeem a reward coupon for one free soda. Yes, the very same reward coupon from last week. The cashier encountered a problem running the reward coupon. I said “don’t worry, I can wait.” A line started to form behind me. He continued to punch in codes, averting his gaze from the ever growing line.

Behind me children were getting restless, girlfriends urged their boyfriends to see what the holdup was, the elderly started to regret having Mexican for dinner. I… was there smiling, patiently looking forward to my free small 32oz Cherry Coke.

Finally the cashier, his face covered in pimples, looked at me and said “In order to process this I will need to get my manager.” Without thinking I responded, “Okay, I can wait.” The children, now rampaging throughout the theater lobby, demanded their sugared treats. Boyfriends regretted designating tonight as movie night. Teens created #StuckInLineForeverBecauseOfCheapMan. It was then the charade I had once called my reality vanished and left behind an undeniable truth; somehow, unbeknownst to me, I had become “that guy.”